12-Year-Old: SNL Not As Good As It Used To Be

CANTON, OH—After watching this past week’s Saturday Night Live hosted by Charlize Theron, local 12-year-old Charlie Gatton reiterated his long-held belief that the weekly sketch show just isn’t as good as it used to be. “Don’t get me wrong—I think the show is funny, but it’s just not like the old days,” said Mr. Gatton, […]

Comcast Lures Customers With 1 Billion Channel Package

PHILADELPHIA, PA – In response to the millions of customers cutting their cable in favor of streaming services like Netflix and Hulu Plus, Comcast Corporation has announced a new cable package with 1 billion channels. “Viewers are demanding ever more personalization,” said Comcast CEO Brian Roberts in a press release, “and our new Executive Package, […]