Comcast Lures Customers With 1 Billion Channel Package

PHILADELPHIA, PA – In response to the millions of customers cutting their cable in favor of streaming services like Netflix and Hulu Plus, Comcast Corporation has announced a new cable package with 1 billion channels. “Viewers are demanding ever more personalization,” said Comcast CEO Brian Roberts in a press release, “and our new Executive Package, […]

Congress Postpones New Year’s Resolutions To March 2014

WASHINGTON, DC – Unable to come to a consensus on the country’s New Year’s resolutions before the final session of 2013, members of the Senate and House of Representatives agreed to delay the decision on the annual improvement measures to March 2014. “At this juncture, the Democrats refused to reach across the aisle, putting us […]