CDC To Quarantine, Murder Healthcare Workers From West Africa

ATLANTA, GA—In an effort to battle the spread of Ebola into the United States, the Center for Disease Control and Prevention announced a new policy to quarantine and then murder all healthcare workers coming from West Africa. “To date, our attempts to contain Ebola have not been successful. As such, we are imposing a new […]

Dallas Resident Didn’t Even Want To Have Lunch With Ebola Patient

DALLAS, TX—Following the news that Thomas Eric Duncan was diagnosed with the Ebola virus, area man Kevin Jameson expressed severe regret as he didn’t even want to have lunch with Mr. Duncan in the first place. “He asked me to lunch as we hadn’t seen each other in a while because of his trip to […]