Report: Feet Under Bathroom Stall Definitely Mike’s

January 27, 2015 by Leave a Comment

IRVINE, CA—A new report issued this morning stated that in the men’s restroom at Skyworks Solutions the feet underneath the bathroom stall are definitely Mike’s. “At approximately 10:04 AM this morning, the pair of feet visible below the stall dividers assuredly belong to Michael Fritz from accounting,” read the report, which arrived at the conclusion […]

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Nation’s Office Workers Take 6-Minute Vacation To Bathroom

September 29, 2014 by Leave a Comment

WASHINGTON, DC—A Gallup poll showed that the nation’s office workers took a 6-minute vacation to the bathroom today. “I decided that I needed to get away after my afternoon conference call, so I traveled to the men’s bathroom and took some me time,” said Bill Graves, one of the country’s 150 million employees who decided […]

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