DALLAS, TX—Citing a general lack of clarity after witnessing an almost perfect performance from his team’s quarterback, local Cowboys fan Mike Graves has been left dumbfounded by his inability to blame this weekend’s playoff loss on Tony Romo. “Most of my friends are blaming the referees for calling Dez Bryant’s fourth quarter catch an incomplete pass, but somehow that feels wrong to me,” said the lifelong Cowboys fan who has grown accustomed to blaming every playoff loss on Romo but has been unable to do so following Romo’s 143.6 QB rating performance, leaving Mr. Graves in an alleged state of existential crisis. Reportedly, the fact that Romo did not blow it with an interception or fumble during the final minutes of the game has forced a flabbergasted Mr. Graves to search for another single factor or event to pin the entire loss on. “Maybe I just have to go with blaming the refs too.” In related news, a Carolina Panthers fan was completely comfortable blaming their loss on the entire organization.
Completely lost
The Lonely Petunia 
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