Last Satirical Newspaper Closes Doors One Year After Charlie Hebdo Paris Attacks

NEW YORK, NY—With more than a year gone by after the tragic killings at the Charlie Hebdo headquarters in Paris, the last and final satirical newspaper finally closed its doors. “There’s simply no place for satirical news anymore. Those attacks changed everything and showed us the truth. They truly were the downfall of satire forever,” said Larry McAllister, the editor-in-chief of The National Tamale, a satirical on-line newspaper run by several comics in the New York metro area. Following the terrorist attacks, sites like The Onion and The Borowitz Report were the first to cease publication, though they were soon followed by television shows like The Daily Show with Jon Stewart and Last Week Tonight with John Oliver. Since then, satirists continued to close shop and stop writing humorous musings about everything including radical extremists, the political gridlock in DC, and how most people use their phone while sitting on the toilet. Reportedly, The National Tamale, who held out longer than any other site, decided to end their run because readership of their funny articles had dwindled to zero in the past few months. “I’ll give credit to where credit is due. Those terrorists won.” At press time, reports came in that someone might have laughed in Chicago for the first time in 12 months but it was confirmed as a cough / sneeze combo.

Fun’s over.