Dallas Resident Didn’t Even Want To Have Lunch With Ebola Patient

DALLAS, TX—Following the news that Thomas Eric Duncan was diagnosed with the Ebola virus, area man Kevin Jameson expressed severe regret as he didn’t even want to have lunch with Mr. Duncan in the first place. “He asked me to lunch as we hadn’t seen each other in a while because of his trip to Liberia, but, to be perfectly honest, I did everything I could to get out of it,” said Mr. Jameson, who is now being rigorously tested for the deadly disease due to his acceptance of the lunch appointment at TGI Fridays. Sources confirmed that Mr. Jameson attempted to get out of the meeting with several excuses including a work meeting, doctor appointment, and fictitious previous plans, but nothing succeeded in preventing him from having a roast beef sandwich with the country’s patient zero. “I thought I was totally out of it by saying I wasn’t feeling well, but he was willing to reschedule for the next day.” At press time, Kelly Winters was informed that she really shouldn’t have had drinks with Mr. Jameson last night.

The fries were pretty good though.