Isreal, Hamas Remove 4,738th Pair Of Gloves

JERUSALEM, ISREAL—Following the tragic kidnapping and killing of three Isreali teens and one Palestinian teen, leaders of Isreal and Hamas have vowed that they are now taking off their 4,738th pair of proverbial gloves. “We view these actions to be an act of war, and we will stop at nothing to defend ourselves,” said Isreali Defense Minister Moshe Ya’alon, noting that the kidnappings were the final straw that broke the camel’s back for the 1,897th time. Chairman of the Hamas Political Bureau Khaled Mashal retorted by saying that the murder of a Palestinian teen kicked the tension between the two groups up to a 10,783rd notch, the highest recorded notch in history. Political strategists around the globe noted that neither side is playing games anymore and both sides are asking to be held back.  “The tragic events over the past several days, we fear, have thrown the 99,782nd lit match into the powder keg,” said U.S. Secretary of State John Kerry. Final reports show that Isreal has asked Hamas if they want to take this outside again.

Lot more where that came from

Lot more where that came from

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