MINNEAPOLIS, MN—Meeting for the first time in person last night after weeks of e-mails on eHarmony, area couple Dan Graves and Lauren Fischer finally consummated their destiny set forth by fate and a computer algorithm. “I feel like we’ve made a real connection,” said Lauren, who came into contact with Dan as dictated by their eternal plan and executed by a string of computer code that matched their profiles based on similar personal interests and their mutual, stated love of dogs. Sources confirmed that their meeting at Bar Louie was the result of a dual effort by the Almighty God when He created the heavens and earth and computer engineer Takashi Sugimoto when he designed and programmed the “Weekly Feature” e-mail blast highlighting Lauren’s profile in Dan’s in-box. “I can just tell in my heart that a higher power [and a system of quadratic and linear equations] made this night happen.” In related news, the couple sitting next to Dan and Lauren were brought together by fate and alcohol.
This post can also be found on The Whiskey Journal.
Love 2.0
The Lonely Petunia 
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