- Catch up on reading
- Dance to your heart’s content before anyone can tell you you’re a terrible dancer
- Suck your thumb. It’s cool. Everyone does it.
- Open a deli
- Imagine what Mount Rushmore might look like during the wintertime
- Think of all the ways you’re going to piss mom off when you’re 2
- Listen to the muffled sounds of Mozart
- Right when things get quiet…ninja kick
- Give kale a shot
- Get rich or die trying
- Vagina dive
- Consider staying an extra week or two. You deserve it.
- Get an early start on your memoirs
- Shoplift
- Live for one month in a foreign womb
- Learn how to juggle
- See Schindler’s List
- The Macarena
- Develop that brain of yours and grow some fingers while you’re at it
- Invite another fetus over for wine and cheese
- Twist and shout
- Go an entire month without exercise
- Perfect that Jos Pesci impersonation you got going
- 100 consecutive summersaults
- Hold breath for 9 months
Don’t let those 9 months go to waste.
The Lonely Petunia 
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