Total Fucking Weirdo Has Three-Legged Dog Though

QUEENS, NY – A local man dressed from head to toe in leather with multiple piercings and a pitch black mow hawk terrifies the many passersby who see him on the street, at least until they notice that the man is walking a three-legged dog, which probably means he’s a very caring individual with nothing but love in his huge heart. “I was completely intimated by all the buckles and weird make-up,” said Aaron Friedman, who was walking back from Chipotle. “I was just going to keep my head down and avoid eye contact with the freak. That is, until I noticed his dog. And then I realized that this gentle man is probably just misunderstood, and lives a life of tenderness I can only imagine.” Melanie Andrews was going to turn her baby stroller right around to protect her daughter from the monstrous misanthrope before noticing Spud, the dog with a missing hind leg and subject of the mutant’s undying affection. “It just warms my soul,” gushed Mrs. Andrews who then went over to pet Spud’s furry little head before his grisly owner told her to “burn” for her “sins” and marched away. “Awww, bless his heart.”

Don't judge a book by its eyeliner

Don’t judge a book by its eyeliner

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