Man without a Cover on His iPhone a Cocky Motherfucker

ST. LOUIS, MO – A man riding the bus yesterday was seen holding a brand new iPhone 5, however he did not have a protective cover encasing the device, the prick. Philip Egan bought the phone last week for $200 with a new 2-year contract and a dangerously inflated ego. “I mean, who does this d-bag think he is?” said a fellow bus traveler. “Those new iPhone’s don’t even have the metal frame anymore; they’re just cheap Chinese plastic and will shatter on contact.” The bus driver added, “You know, last week, I dropped my iPhone for no goddamn reason. I didn’t bump nothing or trip my ass. My brain just told my hand to open up and, sure as hell, my phone fell right to the fucking ground. Would have broke if it weren’t for my Cardinals themed phone case. What, does this sonofabitch think he’s better than me?” An anonymous source from the Verizon Wireless store disclosed that Mr. Egan also chose to forgo the insurance, which means replacing his phone would cost upwards of $600. “Oh, so I guess he’s a rich asshole too. Now he’s just asking for it.”

It's like looking into the future

It’s like looking into the future

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